Chaplain Joan Paddock Maxwell on a perceived barrier

Encouraging Patients to Offer Spoken Prayer

After a couple of years as a hospital chaplain, I noticed that my own personal prayer life had gotten somewhat richer, and I wondered why that was. After some reflection, it came to me that perhaps this was because I was spending a great deal of time in the hospital praying out loud for patients. This seemed wrong to me – why should I benefit in this way when I was trying to support patients in their prayer lives?

So I decided to try to find ways to encourage patients to pray out loud more. Early in this experiment I had an experience which has kept me on this path. I was seeing a homeless lady in her late 40s with a lively faith who had full-blown AIDS, had more family and personal problems than you could shake a stick at, and yet somehow had that spark of life that is wonderful to see. When I said to her, "Are you gonna lead the prayer?" she replied, "I can't. I don't know how to lead prayer. I know all these people at the shelter can lead prayer, but I can't."

Hearing her speak of a perceived barrier between herself and God distressed me greatly. I knew I couldn't make her life "better," but I was resolved to at least help her feel empowered to lead prayer. So I said, "You know, it's really very easy. You start by naming who you're praying to. Then you say what's in your heart. Sometimes you say, 'Thank you.' Then you say,” Amen."

"What do you mean 'name?'"

''Well, do you call God, 'God,' or 'Heavenly Father,' or 'Heavenly Mother,' or 'Allah,' or..."

"'My heavenly Father.'"

"Great. So you can start by saying, 'My heavenly Father.'"

She looked at me, openmouthed, and then slowly whispered, "My heavenly Father." Then she looked at me again.

"What's in your heart? Just say what's in your heart."

And she began praying, first uncertainly, and then with greater and greater conviction, a beautiful prayer that was a privilege to share. She ended the prayer by saying, "Thank you. Amen." Then she turned to me, eyes shining. "I did it!" she exulted.

"You sure did," I agreed.

The next time I went to see her she was about to leave the hospital for hospice. We talked a little bit, and then the ambulance crew came for her. I took her hands and suggested prayer. "Who's gonna lead?" I asked, hoping but uncertain.

"Me," she said firmly, and again offered a heartfelt prayer. When we hugged good-bye I said, "Remember, now you can always lead prayer, wherever you are."

"I know," she said calmly, gathering up a plastic bag containing all her worldly possessions. She then climbed on the gurney to go to hospice.

Ever since that encounter I have become more and more convinced that encouraging the other person to lead the prayer is an important pastoral act. Occasionally there's a patient who happily claims the leadership role, but most of the time I have to encourage them. It's worth it.

Do you have thoughts about professional practice you’d like to share with your colleagues? Send an e-mail info@PlainViews.org.